Friday, August 21, 2015

Women & their Bodies

I truly have no room to be blogging on such a topic as women and their bodies. I'm possibly the hardest on myself when it comes to body image, however, many conversations I've had it the last month have triggered deeper thinking.

For example from my personal experience.
A once 230 lb female dropping 90 pounds in a year. I did a lot of running and minimal weight training. I lost the weight and I did it fast by HOURS of running and not eating enough (not ideal). Even when I was at my lowest weight of 134 lbs, I still had lose skin around my midsection. I can remember getting dressed and pointing at lose skin around my stomach and telling my mom,
"GRRR, I'm SOOOOO FAT!"
She asked me, "Alison, what are you trying to accomplish? What weight will you be happy at?!"
Me, "I don't know! I just don't want this fat here!"
She would sigh because there isn't much one can tell a crazy weight obsessed person to be honest.

With my mother, this was when I was about my largest.

Just running, at my smallest

So fast forward to not being able to maintain ungodly amounts of cardio and barely eating. Personally, this would be the whole reason for hiring myself a Coach/Trainer. One can't do this fitness journey alone. I personally need the accountability of someone to be honest with me and tell me to chill the hell out or to step it up and stop whining. So with that said, I'll be moving into year number three of being with my Coach and getting healthy.

With having a Coach, I lost weight then gained weight. I've had ups and downs. I've learned that I have to be more diligent about my diet and nutrition than the typical person. When it comes to having someone hold me accountable, there's no under eating & there's no binge eating. It's all about balance! It's all about controlling what I can to be better, but it's been hard as hell!

Then there's a whole other element... What about looking in the mirror? That's the whole point of this blog anyway! I didn't like what I looked like at 230 lbs so I made a change. But I still didn't find satisfaction in my body at 134 lbs! And now, where I fall right in between... Shit is hard! It's hard to look in the mirror and say, "DAMN I LOOK GOOD!" Realistically, I can't maintain 134 lbs nor do I want to be 230 pounds! Whole reason I started was to be HEALTHY right?! Is loving myself realistic?



I listen to clients and friends who have just had babies or babies years ago. They tell me about the changes their bodies went through. The changes their hormones go through. They tell me about all that comes with nursing and it's mind blowing to hear all the things a mom does in a 24 hour period for not only their babies, but their husbands, animals, and friends. It's HUMBLING! Yet they still struggle to look in the mirror. So why do us woman spend so much time not loving our bodies? I'm 100% GUILTY! We spend more time looking at other women wishing we had their body, when they're most likely looking back at us wishing they had our arms, legs, stomach, chest, butt, hair, eyes... WHATEVER!

Do I have an answer to this? Actually I don't! I wish I did. But I wanted to share this photo that my client had shared with me. It's all so easy to get caught up in comparing everything we are not, but how many times do we tell ourselves- "I love myself"? As parents, I'm sure you tell your babies you love them. But here's my challenge to you...
Take a deep breath in front of them and say, "I'm so proud of my body!"
A positive physical outlook has to start at an early age, why not start modeling it by how we take care of ourselves!

My mother has always said, "you can't love anyone until you love yourself". Still this day I believe that. I may suck a practicing it, but I always keep it in the back of my mind. My body doesn't determine my worth, but I can't not take care of it. I have to be the best version of myself when it comes my my mind, body, and soul.

As always, I enjoy reading and talking with many of you who read my blog. Feel free to comment here, Facebook, Instagram, twitter, email or in person. 

With Love,
A